Thoughts to ponder...
by: Jack Handy
To me, it's always a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?," you can say, "Sorry, got these sacks."
Why do the caterpillar and the ant have to be enemies? One eats leaves, and the other eats caterpillars. Oh, I see now.
I think somebody should come up with a way to breed a very large shrimp. That way, you could ride him, then after you camped at night, you could eat him. How about it, science?
If you think a weakness can be turned into a strength, I hate to tell you this, but that's another weakness.
If you're ever stuck in some thick undergrowth, in your underwear, don't stop and think of what other words have "under" in them, because that's probably the first sign of jungle madness.
Love can sweep you off your feet and carry you along in a way you've never known before. But the ride always ends, and you end up feeling lonely and bitter. Wait. It's not love I'm describing. I'm thinking of a monorail.
It's fun to laugh... Good times...
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2 comments:
If sign makers go on strike, do they make protest signs?
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."
haha, my favorite
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